Hi Guys! Let’s talk about the different kinds of Nigerian tailors today we all come across sooner or later. Lol. I am certain that I am not the only one who has stories from encounters with some Nigerian tailors.
The Perfect tailor.
Ok let’s call this “almost perfect” Nigerian tailor ( I feel like perfect ones only exist in our imagination). You give this ones material to sew for you and he or she measures you, sews exactly what you have in mind or even better, and it sizes you perfectly. Not too tight, not too prudish. You wear the finished product to rave reviews 👊🏾 from your friends and colleagues and you even get more customers for said good tailor.
The “I wanna belong crew”.
These Nigerian tailors claim to be experts but are only expert in talking and bragging. They don’t know what on earth you mean by ruffle and ballerina but they will never tell you so.
They may even turn it to fight if you insist. Never tell this sort to sew you jump suits because their sewing is horrible and the end product looks nothing like what you showed him or her .
You describe to this type of tailors the kind of segcy gown you saw on Bellanaija, and even show them the pictures of front, back, left and right. They assure you they know how to sew it, and that in fact “the tailor that sewed the one on bellanaija did not get it well” 😍.
However, your heart sinks when you finally collect it. The end product resembles nothing like the design.
And if you dare say that ” this is not what I told you to sew, they never concur, they tell you ” but that is the design you showed /described to me nah”.
Oh! Did I tell you they also never accept faults.
The expensive tailors.
This ones charge you an arm and a leg for the exact same thing you sewed for a cheaper price elsewhere. Ironically, expensive doesn’t always mean perfect and these ones claim to sew clothes for Governors and senators and their wives and make you feel like they are doing you a favour by sewing for you. Don’t you dare bring an inferior material to these ones because their sewing fee is going to buy your material ten times over. Lol.
There’s the “seemingly deaf and never get it right tailor. ”
These set of Nigerian tailors make you wonder if they graduated from tailoring school. They never ever get the style you give to them. Whether it is simple or complicated, the final version sewn will never fit you.
They nod and gesticulate when you describe what you want but they sew what they like. These ones are the only set whose amendments are even worse than the original badly sewn one. After “amendments”you look pregnant and like you have three boobs.
The local tailors
Local Nigerian tailors know their place. They’re very good at sewing iro and buba, fixing worn zips and doing small adjustments. Just don’t bring your expensive ask ebi to these ones or tell them to add materials for you or you are liable to end up with shiny, outdated materials which they tell you is ” reigning”. Lol. They are local champions and they know it. They don’t pretend they are doing you a favour by making you a dress, neither do they charge you excessively. They stay in their local lane and charge you for the kind of service you will expect to get from them. Nothing fancy, elaborate or tasking.
The lying crew
This is like a club so most if not all of the above types of tailors are all members. It’s like a secret club that they all get indoctrinated to. Here is what I imagine their oath looks like.
I pledge to lie to my customers that I can finish their cloth in two days even when I have to sew for an entire bridal team. I also pledge to lie to said customer that their clothes are ready when I am yet to even cut it. I pledge to lie that my great grandmother arose from the dead just so I can buy time and avert their wrath. Lol
Am I lying? They start their lies from day one. They first of all tell you they aren’t over charging you and proceed to recite the price of everything they have to buy for your cloth. In fact, they are hardly “making any gain” they tell you #Yimu.
The always-disappointing crew
This one too is a club, but it’s not compulsory membership like the lying one, therefore only those who are interested subscribe. These ones have never not disappointed. They collect your money and either don’t pick your call or you get there the day before the wedding you bought N40k Aso ebi for to collect your cloth and the tailor has not even touched your cloth. Lol.
It always takes a lot of threats, phone calls and fights before you finally get the finished cloth. You vow never to go to them again but whosai? Next aso ebi that lands your way, You still end up there.lol.
I have encountered almost all of the above and my encounter with Blesing the tailor is what inspired this post. Ironically I thought Blessing was a standard tailor. Her mannequins displayed the most beautiful clothes. My people! She finished sewing the clothes but they had no fitting. None whatsoever. I was so disappointed. Not like her charges was even cheap.
So Guys! What tailor tales do you have for us? What group does your Tailor fall in? Whether they call themselves fashion designer or tailor by their works thou shall know them. Lol.
All memes from Zikoko. So many more here: