It can be really hard when that thing we desire with all our heart and soul eludes us. I know how hard I struggled when a relationship I had was forced to come to an unexpected end. Lol.
I really struggled with the fact that God could say No to such a seemingly perfect guy.
The thing is we tend to think of God as a Yes God. You know, that he ought to say Yes to everything we ask and present to him, especially when it seems good to our eyes. But when we ask him for something and he says No to that thing we present happily to him for his consent ( or he just doesn’t give it to you) , it can be quite disconcerting.
It makes us think that he doesn’t love us or that he doesn’t care or understand what is at stake.
We see good stuff and we ask God for his permission thinking that for sure he will say yes. I mean in our minds “what’s not to say yes to”?
This can happen with relationships, a seemingly good job offer, a chance to travel abroad, a business investment that can yield Millions, a political appointment etc. In short anything that seems good to our eyes and to our heart but our Spirit says No. And because we are human, sometimes we struggle with that Spirit.
You may even think you are hearing incorrectly. And you ask yourself.
” Is it possible for God to say No?
After all, the person, opportunity or offer is perfect” , You start to doubt the dream, revelation , feeling, conviction or pastor who told you God said No. That is until you marry stubbornly and he turns into a wife beater immediately after the honeymoon or you take up that job offer and things go well at first, until you get a sack letter barely a year into that new job or the Government bans the production of what you invested all your life savings on.
The truth is that God’s ways are not our ways. Anytime he says No to us, he isn’t doing it to spite us. He is actually looking out for us.
God will not say No to you just for the sake of saying No or because he feels like it. That’s not God. He isn’t like our parents who you ask for that extra piece of Fish or a car and they say No just for the sake of saying no or because they cannot afford it. God has everything at his disposal. He can afford to give you anything good.
When God says No he is doing it because of the love he has for us, to avoid future disappointment, because he has better things ahead, because he wants to perfect some things, and because his thoughts towards us are of good and not of evil to bring us to a expected end.
God can say No because what we are asking will not bring us to that expected end. In my post on how I almost became an environmental lawyer, I shared the story of how I was unable to travel abroad for my Masters. I was really disappointed, but God was actually looking out for me. Compare mine to when my brother traveled for his Masters, very easy, no drama, and he even got a partial scholarship.
A yoruba adage says ” a shoro she bi oun ti Olorun o lowo si” meaning ” as hard to do or achieve like what God does not have a hand in”.
Sometimes things don’t just work out because God has a better plan. That thing you want so badly may just be eluding you because it’s not yet time. You may not get that Visa after countless fasting and prayers because traveling abroad will only lead to tears or sorrow for you, you may end up not marrying the love of your life because you will end up with regrets.
A lot of people might have been alive today if they didn’t get that seemingly amazing breakthrough or met that perfect person.
No matter how sad or disappointed we are when it seems like God is saying No, let us try to swallow our disappointment and believe that he knows best.
It took me years to finally realize why that relationship didn’t work out. It was simple, he wasn’t God’s will for me. At the time, I didn’t know I would one day be born again, teach a class in Church, have an inspirational blog or be called into Ministry. He wouldn’t have fit into the life I have now, that’s for sure. But God is the owner of the future, he saw what I didn’t see, and he said No because there is something better ahead.